I know I am American when...

I know I am American when...

I complain about walking everywhere and miss my car when I see a blue Mazda similar to mine rolling through the street;

The pollution in the streets makes my eyes water and my throat burn;

Skype doesn´t work on the computer, and I can´t hear the person on the other end of the line, so my frustration level increases dramatically;

I go to bed, and it sounds as if the cars are driving over me honking their horns. I can´t fall asleep;

My fingernails are dirty, and it bothers me;

I flinch each time I hear a fireworks explosion for a birthday or a celebration;

and the men with big guns guarding expensive shops catch my attention each time I see them.